Thinking About Leaving Your Spouse or Partner?
How much is too much?
It Depends on when you are thinking about it.
Everyone has thought about it one time or another. Bad things happen in this life and bam, you think “What would happen if I just left?” Fights happen. Stress can feel overwhelming. Thoughts creep in about what your life would be like if you had made different decisions. That doesn't make you a bad person.
But, when you think about it can be a game-changer.
Never use the threat of leaving as a weapon or a bargaining chip in a fight or argument. Thinking it is one thing, but once you say it, you don't get a do-over. The words stay long after they leave your mouth.
In the heat of an argument, the "fight or flight" part of your brain wants to end the confrontation is one of two ways. You need to ask your “adult brain” do I really want to leave and all of the consequences that go with it.
After you've had time to cool down and think about it, you can ask yourself that question again “Do I really want to leave?”
If the answer is yes, you need to ask yourself more questions. I don't mean thinking about over coffee. I mean take time to soul search and ask yourself, “Will this person be there for you? Are you living your best life? Have you managed your own expectations?”
Maybe counseling is the answer or maybe not. Maybe it's time to do what you need to do.